LOVE <3 LOVE <3

Monday, April 10, 2006

thanks carol. for putting up the tag board for me. love you manys.
thanks charr. i noe u care. thank you. i din mean to cry alone orchard road. i was too angry, upset and hurt. but im feeling better alrd.
life for me is kinda fucked up now. i din mean to use that word. but still i feel that way. oh wells. yes, i feel annoyed easily for no exact reason, i feel that my existent means nothing but annoyance. i go around upsetting people without having the intention to. i simply suck.
but that was last wk. now, even thou my life has a slight change to the better direction, but still i cant help but feel i lil insecure and sensitive towards certain issues and comments and actions by certain people. probably bcos having myself go thru all the pain and lies u had inflicted on me.
now that i think back, i wonder which part of u is true. i feel like going up to you and scold you. i don care. but part of me thinks that i shudnt give u another problem anymore. i feel like telling the whole world all that u haf done, but i noe u dont deserve it. i was silly to allow myself to get decieved by you. i was naive. not that i want to make myself sound so great and nice, but sigh. i duwan to hurt anione. cos the level of profile u are experiencing is high till the extent that u onli fucking care about yourself. selfish. thank you, for allowing me to see the true nature of man. thank you, for making me lose hope in man again. thank you.
i believe that things happen for certain reasons. i think i noe wads the reason behind certain things. something that are not meant for anione to know, only me. heh heh. its funny how i feel nowadays. cos i duwan to feel how i feel towards certain people. but yet, i cant help it but feel that way. it just keep coming back. no matter how hard u try not to recall those times u had those feelings, they still come back to you after such a long time. no matter how convincing ur words to others are, deep inside u, u know its not true. no matter how much u feel for someone, how much u want them to know, how much you want them to be with you always, u behave oppositely just the way you wanted. sometimes i wonder why.

shedded at 8:22 AM